Michael

frottage and monogamy

11-23-2003

Thanks Bill for your writings. They echo the way I have always felt. I absolutely agree with the words you speak. I have had such a problem with the idea of anal sex, but I love man to man sex. Your words make so much sense to me. You have given me an added confidence, where up to now I felt quite alone on the issue. Furthermore I have craved monogamy and found it illusive. I didn't want me or someone who was with me to become the weakened sort of person I see people become in many gay relationships. I agree with you that anal sex and polygamy contribute to the erosion and debasement of a person's self esteem and character. I too feel that anal sex doesn't make any sense at all physically and emotionally.

For me sex doesn't exist isolated from love. I want love to love and be loved. I don't know how people can handle polygamous sex, because love is a grown thing, something nurtured and developed. I can't see how it can grow if people just use each other for their own gratification in isolation from love, and move on.

I really believe my homosexuality is related to a few specific things, related to my need for acceptance and love, and my need to generate acceptance and love. I figure God neither loves us particularly, nor rejects or abandons us particularly. I subscribe to the Hindu view that God is like the sun, shining and giving life regardless of what we do, and it's up to us to learn to recognise the value of the sun and figure out how best to relate to the life giving properties of the sun or not. That idea relates to the Biblical issue of free will being the hallmark of humans. It's by our free will that we chose to be warmed by God and the world God has made for us, or be left in the cold. It's by our free will that we chose to know the truth or be alienated from the truth and the feeling of being in harmony with life. So that gives me a great sense of responsibility.

I believe that free will is the hallmark of human beings. It's by our free will that we chose to know the truth or be alienated from the truth and the feeling of being in harmony with life. So that gives me a great sense of responsibility.

Frottage and monogamy, I think, are very harmonious with finding and growing love between people, I believe. No emotional pain no emotional gain, and relationships are not all smooth sailing. But it's the challenges as well as the joys that deepen relationships, and I can't see how people can learn and experience that deepening when they run off chasing another tail when things get challenging in a relationship.

Thanks for your work, and your decision to put it out there. It has been a benefit to me, and I am grateful for that.

Michael.

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