mrjayallen

THIS is who I am

3-11-2005

Gay, staight, bisexual... Throw these labels out of the door!

I am a MAN who likes the body of a MAN

The mainstream sexual field is so FEAR driven. Words like SAFE, PROTECTION, FUCK only scare me from experiencing and exploring my own true sexual reality.

Last night, thanks to this website, I had a REAL encounter into what sex is about. Because of mainstream attitudes infiltrating my mind, I was paranoid, nervous, unsure. My new friend invited me to his apartment. I was so uptight, it took an erotic film to get my juices going. My friend offered me a massage. "That's safe," I told myself. I took off my shirt, lie down on the bed, and waited. "You'll have to take everything off," was his reply. I did so, but with dread of what may be waiting for me. Was my body good enough for him? Would he like me just as I am?

The massage was wonderful, but then he felt up my leg. Would he try to go there? To my amazement and relief, he respected my body, treated me as an equal.

Both naked together, we were the same. Boudaries of age, ethnic background, life experiences faded away to nothing. We were MEN, not numbers or statistics. There was a mutual feeling of pleasing the other person, not grotesque selfish desires.

What seemed to be inadequacies morphed into diverse manifestations of identity. The two of us so different, but in the moments of love, we were the same. Real men are not ashamed to love each other, respect each other. In true Man2Man relationship, there is mutuality, friendship, unity in the whole being: physical, intellectual, spiritual.

This is who I am. I AM MAN!!! My identity is not WHO I love (gay, straight, bisexual), but rather HOW I love (respect, mutuality, equality).

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