Bill Weintraub

Re: Frot in Europe vs. the US

8-13-2006

Hey h2 guy

Thank you for your post.

First of all I need to say something to all the guys.

Right now I am being deluged with email and posts.

What I'm not being deluged with are donations.

That's not right.

Rm had a post some months ago titled Working for nothing.

He said you treat Bill like a slave.

He's right.

But it's not just that.

It's that you expect me to create social change out of thin air and nothing else.

THAT IS NOT POSSIBLE.

You also expect me to somehow find you a lover or husband or whatever out of thin air and nothing else.

THAT IS NOT POSSIBLE.

The Toronto AIDS Conference is starting today -- Sunday -- and I'll be posting, whenever I get caught up, some of the dollar figures associated with that conference.

They're breathtaking.

Almost everything that will be said and done at that conference re HIV prevention is opposed to what we believe.

And it has HUGE FINANCIAL BACKING.

HIV is a really easy pathogen to avoid.

Yet it has afflicted 65 million people on this earth.

25 million of whom are dead.

Of course there will be a lot of talk in Toronto about treatment -- which is fine.

But there will also be a lot of talk about prevention, most of which will be nonsense or worse than nonsense.

Fact is, vast sums are being used to promote condoms, and with them, anal and promiscuity.

While we have NO money.

If you want to see change, DONATE.

And be realistic.

I am not a magician.

I'm a social theorist and activist, and I cannot ACT without MONEY.

DONATE.

Now, let's get back to h2's question:

I've decided to relocate to either Barcelona, Spain or San Francisco. I'm afraid if I chose Barcelona I will be unable to find a frot partner, since most of the man2man alliance listings are from the US.

Do you think I'll have a harder time finding a partner in Europe?

As we've been discussing recently on this board in posts like THE POWER OF THE MASCULINE and NATURAL MASCULINITY and the weight of the lies, the process of heterosexualization has been most thorough and widespread in the post-industrial West, which includes both the US and the EU.

Under heterosexualization, there has developed a false social classification called sexual orientation;

and under the rules of sexual orientation, masculine men who acknowledge their attraction to other men are shunted off into gay ghettoes which de facto are controlled by feminized males.

We call those ghettoes "analist," and analism rules the roost in gay male communities throughout the post-industrial, heterosexualized West.

That's all by way of saying that whether you're in Barcelona or San Francisco, the gay community will be analist.

And you'll be expected and pressured to do anal.

And you'll have a hard time finding other Frot men.

I've lived in SF.

Though extremely expensive, it's a beautiful city with wonderful access to nature.

But in my experience, the gay male community there is very inward looking and expects a high degree of conformity.

Which means anal.

So basically my answer to you, although your question isn't phrased this way, is the same as to anyone who asks about the relative shortage of partners.

Until we raise enough money via donations to get our message out, Frot will remain a denigrated and minority practice in the West, and you'll have a hard time finding partners.

And certainly in a place like SF, you'll come under ENORMOUS pressure to do anal.

Also, h2, you said:

I'm from a town in rural Canada. I've never had a same sex experience, the opportunity has never arisen living in such a small place.

That statement more or less assumes that you're the only man in your town in Canada who has same-sex needs and desires.

That's not true.

Because same-sex needs and desires are universal among men.

It is true that under heterosexualization, men are encouraged and often actually forced to suppress those feelings.

But the feelings remain.

Once you understand that, once you're able to see past what one author calls "The Gay Straight-Jacket," you'll realize that ALL MEN are potential partners.

And you can look past those gay ghettoes, which if you're a masculine-identified man, are a very difficult and damaging place to be.

Whether in Spain or California.

Now, recently I've had the sense that there's a small, nascent Frot community developing in the American Pacific Northwest.

And if you can go anywhere, it may be that that's where you should go.

Particularly if you have an interest in martial arts and mixed martial arts / UFC style grappling.

The person to talk to about that is Beagle Jones, who heads up our Portland Regional Chapter.

But again, and this is addressed to *everyone* reading this post, the culture will not change unless you work to change it.

And right now that means Donating, and getting involved locally in the Regional Chapters.

Wishing will not make it so.

You have to work at it.

Donations have not been good so far in August.

That won't work.

If you're a Masculine Man who loves other Masculine Men, you need to get behind this effort and do your part.

And you need to do it NOW.

As Robert Loring has said, most recently in the men without marriage message thread, the problem today is not just a gay ghetto, but a Male Ghetto:

The Male Ghetto of Western society is growing. It's composed of males of all sexual preferences. It is an ugly ghetto to dwell in. It is a ghetto of the male mind and male soul. It really should come as no surprise then that there are so many males today that are unhappy. It should come as no surprise that many males today have turned to alcohol, drugs, sex, etc. in a futile effort to "cope" with living in the Male Ghetto.

You are right, Bill. We MUST reach out to these males! Somehow society MUST be corrected. Somehow we MUST return to the historical and traditional societal NORMS. Men MUST be once again allowed to be close with other men, form male bonds, and have male space WITHOUT fear of being punished, shunned to the Male Ghetto, and without fear of being labeled.

All of this, as reflected in the articles mentioned above, is part of the ongoing psychospiritual ATTACK on ALL MALES. It is part of an ongoing attack on the innate brotherhood that NATURALLY exists between MEN. This natural sense of brotherhood is a part of male masculinity. It is a part of the Warrior Way! It is a part of the Way to Salvation!

Males, ALL males, today can no longer afford to abandon other males and leave them to their own devices. That is only serving to increase the size of the Male Ghetto! Males MUST once again reach out to other males just as the ancient Warriors did long ago. Males MUST see themselves again as BROTHERS! To continue to abandon our male brethren is to only increase the ills of modern Western society and expand the growing Male Ghetto!!

Alcoholism, drugs, sex are not the answers. Compassion, Brotherhood, and Honor are. Masculinity must once again be honored and esteemed and valued in our society. Males MUST be their brother's guardian, teacher, and lover.

Robert's right.

Guys -- my foreign friend argues that the more masculine the man, the more likely he is to seek a sexual bond with another masculine man.

And that makes sense.

Historically, cross-culturally, and in myth -- that's what warriors did.

They sought what I call the Warrior Bond.

Which was both sexual and extremely masculine.

And about which there's an extensive mythological, Biblical, and historical record.

So: given that the more masculine the man, the more likely he is to seek a sexual bond with another man;

and given that we're living in a society that denies those bonds to masculine men;

clearly, society is fucked-up and men are getting fucked over.

Robert:

Males, ALL males, today can no longer afford to abandon other males and leave them to their own devices. That is only serving to increase the size of the Male Ghetto! Males MUST once again reach out to other males just as the ancient Warriors did long ago. Males MUST see themselves again as BROTHERS! To continue to abandon our male brethren is to only increase the ills of modern Western society and expand the growing Male Ghetto!!

Alcoholism, drugs, sex are not the answers. Compassion, Brotherhood, and Honor are. Masculinity must once again be honored and esteemed and valued in our society. Males MUST be their brother's guardian, teacher, and lover.

Once again, Robert's right.

There's no way around it.

When you abandon your brothers, you abandon yourself.

No way around that.

Fight back guys.

FIGHT.

© All material Copyright 2006 by Bill Weintraub. All rights reserved.