Let's talk about some of the points boomer made.

1. "I could understand your frustrations with the site man. An organization dedicated to men shoving fists up each other's asses has support and regional chapters, but u cannot get that much in donations from the guys on M2M."

That's right.

These guys have regional chapters.

Other than Beagle Jones up in Portland, you guys won't make even the first move towards that.

And each month it's a struggle to keep the sites going.

That's shameful.

2. "I guess at the end of the day it all comes down to the amount of exposure you have out there."

That's right.

And as I explained to boomer, that lack of exposure is by and large a failure of the grassroots.

That's you guys.

How many of you guys have the word "Frot" and / or a link to this site on an online profile?

How many of you are out to friends as a Frot man?

How many of you have volunteered to do a booth or a float at your local Gay Pride festival or parade?

The answer to that last question is -- ZERO.

3. "FFA probably has floats at gay parades with giant fists going up giant asses with big red neon lights that say join Fist Fuckers of America Today. They probably have men in leather outfits running around in clubs handing out pamplets and cards and winking at men while they walk away."

I don't know the particulars of what FFA has, but here's what we could have:

Floats in every Gay Pride parade in every major city with a couple of hired -- or for free -- hunks bumping crotches and holding big wooden phalluses and rubbing them together.

With guys walking beside the float giving out info on Frot.

And a similar booth at the associated Festival.

I've never done a float, but I've done booths, and it's not that complicated.

You sign-up well in advance of the Festival.

If the Festival or Parade is in June, you probably have to reserve space in the early spring -- by March.

And there's a fee -- might be $25 in a smaller place, could be as much as $200 for a non-profit booth in a big city -- but usually will be far less.

All you need besides that is a card table, some folding chairs, a banner, some literature, and a couple guys to staff the table.

That's it.

And instead of spending Gay Day milling aimlessly through the crowd and being ignored, you sit there and cute guys come up to you and talk to you.

It's really easy.

4. "And on top of that they have safe sex counselors teaching newly-out gay men how to fist fuck safely."

Yes.

Because fist fucking is anal, "safer-sex" counselors pay attention to it.

And in years past, they got federal and state money to do that.

Guys, there's not a single penny spent to popularize or educate men about Frot.

Not one cent.

Try to understand that.

Literally millions of dollars are spent annually on discussions of the varieties of anal -- dick in butt, dildo in butt, finger in butt, fist in butt, mouth on butt, mouth sucking shit and cum out of butt -- in the "gay community."

No money is spent on frottage.

Is it surprising that guys think that butt sex is gay sex?

Yet, as Don Frazer said in Finally A Home, "Men experience sexual fulfillment in their genitals, not their butts."

So why are safer-SEX educators spending so much time talking about butts?

If you want to educate guys about SEX, doesn't it make sense to point out to them that "Men experience sexual fulfillment in their genitals, not their butts."

5. "I'm sure it hurts when u know the message you're carrying is beyond solid, yet it can't find outreach."

It doesn't hurt so much as it is extremely frustrating.

As I keep saying.

The people being HURT by YOUR inaction -- are YOU.

What are the things you can do?

1. Put the words Frot and Man2ManAlliance.org on every online profile you have, and anywhere else appropriate on the web -- blogs and message boards are good places.

2. Come out to your family and friends as a man into Frot -- a Frot man.

3. Get involved in organizing your Regional Chapter.

4. Make plans to do a booth at Gay Pride this year.

5. Donate.

Now:

Why do gay men do anal?

Is it genetic?

Do gay men have a genetic predisposition to fuck asses?

Or get fucked?

No.

There's no evidence for that.

All the evidence we have -- cross-cultural and historical -- says that anal is a learned behavior.

Learned.

And all the evidence we have says that gay men took to anal at a time in the 20th century when they were simultaneously defining themselves as a minority community.

Minority cultures are always a reflection of the majority culture in which they exist.

And that's so for analism.

Analism both parallels and parodies heterosex.

Male-female; butch-bitch.

Couldn't be simpler.

Anal at once mirrors the majority culture while giving gay men a defining act which they can think of as uniquely gay.

Even though it isn't.

Nevertheless, that's the thinking:

Straight guys might jerk off with each other.

Only gay men fuck.

Let's repeat this because it's REALLY IMPORTANT that you understand it:

Minority cultures mimic majority cultures.

They attempt, after a fashion, to assimilate -- at the least, to resemble the majority culture.

Not many Jews today remember, for example, that following the "emancipation" of the Jews in late 18th century Germany, there were German Jews who proclaimed that Germany was the new Israel and Berlin their new Jerusalem.

Needless to say, that didn't work out.

Why do minority cultures attempt to assimilate and resemble?

Because it's *seemingly* validating.

Thus if a gay man's sex act resembles a straight person's sex act -- he feels validated by the majority culture.

Just as if a Jewish person has his nose straightened and changes his name from Greenbaum to Green, he may feel "validated" by Anglo / Christian culture.

Is that form of validation -- valid?

No.

True validation comes from within.

From being true to who you are.

Who are gay men?

They are MEN who have SEX with MEN.

What's the NATURAL way to do that?

Just as for everybody else on earth -- genitally.

Among human beings, genital-genital contact is the gold standard for and de facto defines sex.

So: the way for men who have sex with men to find true sexual validation is to have sex genitally -- just as do men who have sex with women.

Anal is not a valid choice.

And "men into anal" are acting in bad faith.

Which is another reason their subculture is so dysfunctional and disease-ridden.

Finally, fist fucking is a subset of "leather" and S&M.

In the gay male community, there are many who view "leather" as "masculine."

Is it?

No.

Masculinity is "that which is natural to a man."

Is having a fist inserted into your ano-rectal canal "natural to a man?"

No.

Nor is wearing leather for the sake of a "sexual" thrill masculine.

There are men who wear leather items in order to do their jobs -- eg, cowboys sometimes wear chaps.

That's a job-related behavior which some might think of as masculine since most cowboys are men, though I daresay there are women ranchers who wear chaps as part of their work too.

Wearing chaps for your job is not the same as putting on chaps and walking around the Folsom Street Leather Fair in SF with your butt hanging out.

The first is authentic.

The second is phoney.

It's ersatz masculinity -- not true masculinity.

Because it's not natural to a man.

Despite that basic truth, among many gay men, fist fucking is viewed as a particularly macho form of anal.

Bizarre.

Can you imagine John Wayne getting fisted?

I can't.

Fisting is neither macho nor masculine.

It's analist.

It's dumb.

And it's incredibly destructive.

I had a friend in NYC who was a member of FFA and died early in the epidemic.

The last time Brett and I spoke to him we asked him if there was anything we could do for him.

He said Yes:

"Pray that I die soon from this terrible disease which is killing me."

It's one of those phrases from the epidemic which has stayed with me over the years -- 20 years, to be exact.

No one saw AIDS coming.

No one.

Considering the relative strength of the Fist Fuckers of America and The Man2Man Alliance -- that too is something to think about.