Bill Weintraub

Re: to share and enjoy my masculinity

2-19-2010

Hey Buddy,

Thank you for writing to me and for your kind words about my work and our sites.

I'm glad they've resonated and been meaningful for you.

Let's take a look:

Just a quick note to tell you how great I think your site is.

Thank you Buddy.

I'm glad we can be here for you.

I feel more comfortable about my desires to share and enjoy my masculinity in a mental, spiritual and physical ... Frot ... way with another like minded guy.

Great!

Buddy, the important thing for you to be clear about is that those desires are natural and normal.

They're part of being a Man.

As one of our Warriors has said, "Male sexual desire for men cannot be tied to a minority group.

It is a *universal* male phenomenon, especially strong among masculine-identified men."

Put more simply --

Guys are attracted to other guys.

Guys have sex with guys.

Always have.

Always will.

Not a big deal.

In cultures which lack a divine prohibition against such attraction, it's expressed openly and is acted upon virtually universal.

I hope to eventually read all of this site.

Good Buddy -- that's the best thing you can do.

And I've sent you a letter which will help guide your reading.

And a good place to start is with our recent Man2Man Alliance policy paper Sex Between Men: An Activity, Not a Condtion.

Thanks man.

Once again, Buddy, you're very welcome.

Later

Buddy

I will eventually share an experience with you.

That would be great!

Bill

And guys, what follows is Buddy's experience, which I'm glad he shared.

You'll be too.

Take a look:

He was having trouble on a bench, pressing that last effort of the day, when I heard panic in his grunt. I ran over to assist. He surreptitiously thanked me. I said "no problem" and walked away. We were both too caught up in our own macho self centered masculine egos to acknowledge that he was having trouble and I aided in protecting him from embarrassment not to mention possible harm. I always remember that day. That is what I always thought was masculinity. That absence of acknowledgment of a need for help between men. That day I recognized more a primal tone of need in his grunt rather than the sound of masculine accomplishment after a good press. When I walked away I noticed something different in the way I felt. It was more than natural for me to react in this primal encounter. I felt a strange connection to him. Like out of all the other guys in the gym that day ... I needed to protect HIM. Almost destined to help HIM!

Later in the shower ... I was rinsing my hair when I heard a faint ... " Hey man." I ignored it and shortly after I felt a hand on my shoulder. I wiped the water from my eyes and turned my head... There HE stood ... in all his naked, wet, glory. With this big alpha male, cock sure, grin on his face. "Thanks for your help earlier man" he said. Looking around making sure no one else in the shower room was there to hear. I responded with a strong ... "no problem guy". He started to explain why he didn't say anything before and I stopped him ... correct masculine etiquette you know ... "Like I said ... 'no problem' ... what are we if a guy can't help out another guy in need right?"

I started to soap up and he properly took the shower head one away from me. We entered into a conversation about lifting and music and then girlfriends. That's when It happened ... we ... as guys will ... got a little raunchy with the sexual conversation and as it is natural for me I started to get that feeling in my groin and my penis started to swell. His back was toward me and as he just kept talking I found myself looking him up and down. His verbal dissertation about his latest sexual experience with his girl was almost muffled by the water but his body movement was not discrete. That muscled back ... his shoulders and arms raised as he soaped his perfectly hairy pits ... and that ass!!!

He turned and I quickly shook off my gaze ... He looked down and smirked ... and said "Looks like you're enjoying my story!" I laughed and excused my semi erection to horniness. "Well I'm enjoying it" he said with a smile as he took his hand and started stroking his fat, veined, fully erect, penis. I just stared ... and got that feeling I had when I pulled the barbell up from his chest. This kind of excited feeling ... more then just the adrenaline in the moment. He looked at me ... rather almost thru me ... those deep blue eyes. His dark black hair wet and dripping. His chest hair matted and flowing with steaming water. Water that flowed down his high tight pectorals. Around nipples dark and round and large. Down his formed abs onto his flat furry belly and then trailing the length of his shaft till it circled under that awesome, uncut flare that was his cock head and then streamed onto the floor. I wanted to be that water ... This moment was poetry. He was willingly stroking off for me and we were both more than enjoying it. We were experiencing a bond that rarely forms between men. This opportunity went fully utilized.

I began to feel myself up for him ... Slowly and confidently. One hand up my stomach, teasing my hair trail up to my abs. Then up slowly to my chest. As I thumbed my right nipple I noticed the intensity in his eyes and I watched his lips part as he softly said "aaawwww yeah man ... show me" Those words made my other hand slowly start to comb my fingers thru my pubes and then reach out the length of my shaft where my finger outlined the head of my fully erect cock. "All for you guy" I boldly whispered.

He walked toward me thru the steam and stood facing me breathing heavy and stroking faster. "Man this is intense ... you're gonna make me cum" I said with my lips about one inch from his ... Then he said it ... in the most seductive voice ... "what are we if a guy can't help out another guy in need" That was it ... my words coming out of his mouth ... In a different context yet the same desperate need. Like he knew we were destined to do what we were doing ... I licked my lips, quivered and shot my load all over his cock. He sighed took a step back looked down at my glossy white cum covering his flare his balls and hand. He looked back up and into my eyes ... shuttered and blasted me with four intense squirts of his own warm, white, seed. Up onto my chest on my belly and then down to my legs . I stood there my arms stretched out as if waiting to receive his anointment.

We stood there for a moment. Then he put a hand to my face pulled me in and kissed me. Mouths closed at first then his tongue parted my lips and we kissed each other with all the masculinity we had within us. A deep, wet kiss. Tongues twirling in torrent with mouths moaning with pleasure. We brazenly embraced and frot our cum soaked bodies together with the passion and lust we reserve for female one night stands.

We came a second time in that mad, erotic, embrace. It was if we were scoffing at taboo. We were bending the rules for all they were worth. We separated ... looked at each other, looked around to see if anyone saw us ... looked at each other again and laughed. We laughed as if we shared a meeting of two old friends who hadn't seen each other in a long time. He said "thanks again man" ... This time I replied ... "your welcome!"

I never saw him again ... I don't even know his name ... But I know he jerks off to that memory as I do ... I can tell ... I can just feel it in my bone!

I wanted to share that with you and your readers if you wish ...

Thank you

Buddy

Bill Weintraub

Re: to share and enjoy my masculinity

2-20-2010

Thank you Buddy.

Excellent -- and very revealing -- as we'll see.

Guys, what's interesting about Buddy's story is that the natural and *aggressive* masculine force we call Warrior Altruism is what creates and motivates the natural and *attractive* erotic encounter between these two guys.

So it's a clear playing out of

Of course the two guys aren't training in a Fight Sport or otherwise fighting at the gym.

But Buddy's friend is involved in an act of masculine aggression -- he's pumping iron -- gets in trouble -- and Buddy helps him.

That's pure Warrior Altruism -- and it's in an aggressive context.

Of course Warrior Altruism has an attractive or affectional component.

But it most often comes into play in a place of Male Aggression and Male Struggle -- either in a place where Men are preparing for or taking part in an Agon -- such as Wrestling, Boxing, or Mixed Martial Arts -- or in an actual war setting itself.

So in this instance the gym, and even though and admittedly most gyms nowadays are fairly etiolated in this regard, nevertheless in this instance the gym functions as a Man Space in which Men Struggle.

And that's what's going on.

The guy Buddy helps is, in the ancient Greek sense, Struggling to bring his Manhood to Perfection;

and when that Struggle leads to trouble, Buddy helps him.

Now, Buddy says about the incident, that

We were both too caught up in our own macho self centered masculine egos to acknowledge that he was having trouble and I aided in protecting him from embarrassment not to mention possible harm. I always remember that day. That is what I always thought was masculinity. That absence of acknowledgment of a need for help between men.

"That is what I always thought was masculinity. That absence of acknowledgment of a need for help between men."

That of course is a heterosexualized view of relationship between straight-identified guys -- that there will always be an "absence of acknowledgment of a need for help between men."

And I hope Buddy and all the rest of you guys understand -- that that's a really distorted view of "masculinity."

It's pseudo-masculinity.

Not at all natural.

It's a "real men don't ask each other for help" charade of masculinity.

But in a Warrior setting, in a setting of Natural Masculinity, guys are always asking and expecting other guys to help them.

Who they help in return.

You can hear that in Warrior NW's brilliant memoir Fighter Beauty, or, A True Test of Toughness, in which he says of Bobby, the Bare Knux Fighter, that

His masculinity attracted me. It was a gentle masculinity, friendly, always ready to help you out. I was attracted to his beauty and his fight talk. He was MAN.

So Bobby -- who's not a weightlifter, which to me is an ersatz male activity, but a Fighter -- which is the core Masculine activity -- has a masculinity which attracts NW:

It was a gentle masculinity, friendly, always ready to help you out.

Because he's a Fighter, because he's embraced his Manhood, Bobby doesn't have to erect artificial barriers to male intimacy by pretending that "real men don't ask each other for help."

Just the reverse -- in the world of the shade-tree mechanic -- he's "always ready to help you out."

That's Bobby -- a Fighter.

And the Spartans, by the way, Fighters all, expanded the idea of Warrior Altruism -- of Men helping each other out -- into other areas of their society.

For example, a Warrior could borrow another Man's hunting dogs or horse -- provided of course that he cared for them and returned them.

And Warriors left caches of food for other Warriors in hunting areas.

The idea being that those who used the food would later replenish it.

They also, and to a limited extent, shared their wives for purposes of eugenic breeding.

That idea makes us uncomfortable, but to them it was rational; and they didn't allow any sort of jealousy or feuding over such arrangements.

Because it was done for the greater good.

So, as Plato observed, Sparta was the rule of Honor, an entire society committed to the standard of Honor.

Which is very much -- Warrior Altruism.

And within that society, male-male love affairs were encouraged, respected, and honored -- provided that they were, as Plutarch puts it, in the service of "modesty, ambition, and a burning desire to excel."

Now --

Buddy's simple act of Warrior Altruism awakens him to that aspect of Natural Masculinity:

That day I recognized more a primal tone of need in his grunt rather than the sound of masculine accomplishment after a good press. When I walked away I noticed something different in the way I felt. It was more than natural for me to react in this primal encounter. I felt a strange connection to him. Like out of all the other guys in the gym that day ... I needed to protect HIM. Almost destined to help HIM!

"It was more than natural for me to react in this primal encounter. I felt a strange connection to him. Like out of all the other guys in the gym that day ... I needed to protect HIM. Almost destined to help HIM!"

"It was more than natural for me to react in this primal encounter."

That's right.

Buddy's reaction is natural -- and primal.

It's one Man helping another Man.

And Buddy feels the force of destiny in that act.

And he's right to feel that.

Because Men are indeed destined to help each other.

That's what Male Life is supposed to be about -- not males predating upon each other to fulfill a bizarre societal doctrine of planet-destroying greed -- but MEN helping each other -- in acts of WARRIORHOOD.

And when, later, in the shower, the guy seeks Buddy out to thank him, Buddy voices the Masculine and above all Manly Imperative of that Warriorhood:

what are we if a guy can't help out another guy in need right?

Good question.

The answer is -- if a guy can't help out another guy in need -- he's NOT a Man.

By which standard -- and it's the only standard -- most of you are NOT men -- because you refuse to help the Alliance.

Even though you tell me -- the Alliance has helped you.

Why else are you here after all?

It's because the Alliance has helped you.

Nevertheless, what you do is allow your stinginess and selfishness -- which are simply expressions of our garbagey culture's societally-sanctioned greed -- to over-rule your Natural Masculinity and what little sense of Warriorhood you might have.

The future for males who do that -- is very bleak.

It's as Danielou says when speaking of the Phallus, but his words apply equally to Warriorhood and Warrior Altruism:

Contempt for this sacred emblem, as well as degradation and debasement of it, pushes man from the divine reality. It provokes the anger of the gods and leads to the decline of the species. The man who scorns the very symbol of the life principle abandons his kind to the powers of death.

All we need do is paraphrase to see the Masculine Truth Danielou expresses.

Because after all, Phallus is Manhood and Manhood is Man -- and Man is Warrior:

Contempt for Man's sacred Warriorhood, as well as degradation and debasement of it, pushes man from the divine reality. It provokes the anger of the gods and leads to the decline of the species. The male who scorns the very essence of the life principle abandons his kind to the powers of death.

And that's the truth.

"The male who scorns the very essence of the life principle -- Warriorhood -- abandons his kind to the powers of death."

That's what's going on in our society.

That's why our society is so sick.

And why our society is sickening the entire world.

But Buddy and his friend do NOT scorn the very essence of the life principle.

Neither scorns it.

Buddy helps a fellow Man in need.

The Man reciprocates -- reciprocal altruism -- by seeking him out in the shower and thanking him.

There, as I said, Buddy enunciates to him the very principle and imperative of Warriorhood and Warrior Altruism -- "what are we if a guy can't help out another guy in need right?" --

and the two MEN are rewarded by a spontaneous celebration of their mutual Masculinity and an exaltation of their Mutual Manhood.

During which, his new friend repeats and validates Buddy's statement:

"Man this is intense ... you're gonna make me cum" I said with my lips about one inch from his ... Then he said it ... in the most seductive voice ... "what are we if a guy can't help out another guy in need" That was it ... my words coming out of his mouth ... In a different context yet the same desperate need.

"my words coming out of his mouth ... In a different context yet the same desperate need."

And the desperate need is that of one Warrior for another.

They needed each other in the Aggressive Man Space -- the work-out floor;

and now they need each other in the Attractive or Affectional Man Space -- which in this instance is just the shower room.

So -- again, Aggression feeds Attraction; or, if you prefer, Aggression feeds Affection:

Now -- you may say to me, But Bill, guys jerk off in the showers all the time.

To which I respond, True.

But in this instance there's a WARRIOR CONNECTION between the two MEN which incalcuably enriches the experience.

Because there's true passion between them.

The guy whom Buddy has helped forces Buddy into a kiss -- a deep kiss -- fast followed by a wild session of full-body Frot.

Which is incredibly hot.

So -- you slackers and male wannabes may believe me or not -- and I don't care because the vast majority of you disgust me --

but what Buddy's story illustrates is that you can't get there with your penises alone.

That, again, is what the vast majority of you think.

That this is just about penis.

It's not.

This is about Manhood, and because human beings are social animals, Manhood exists in a social context -- which we call Warriorhood.

Bobby -- the Fighter in NW's post -- is a MAN because of the group male context of Fighters and Mechanics -- in which he exists.

Bobby, as NW tells us, lives outside of heterosexualized society:

I should add that Bobby never was married, never had any kids that I know of or never had a girlfriend. He was a lone, masculine male, into manly suff. The Man-vibes I got off the dude, up until the end, were intense.

Bobby is a MAN.

But in our society, such a Man is marginalized, and Bobby, therefore, dies an early death.

In Buddy's story, Buddy and his fellow weightlifter have a moment -- but it's just a moment -- in which the two of them create a Warriorhood in which their Natural Masculinity can flourish.

And they have an ecstatic sexual experience as a result.

But Buddy tells us, he never sees the guy again and he doesn't even know his name:

I never saw him again ... I don't even know his name ... But I know he jerks off to that memory as I do ... I can tell ... I can just feel it in my bone!

Buddy without question is correct that the other guy hasn't forgotten the experience.

And jerks off thinking about it.

No doubt he sometimes thinks about it while he's a fucking a woman.

Oh yeah.

That happens too.

Is he thinking about the babe -- or his bud?

BUT -- that Buddy and his friend haven't followed up on what went down between them tells us that the two have reverted to a heterosexualized male existence, in which Natural Masculinity has virtually no place.

And that's a shame.

Because the true Passion of their experience -- which, you'll notice, comes after they've each had their first ejaculation -- the proof of their mutual male desire --

the true Passion of their experience -- tells you that there was a true connection between them:

We stood there for a moment. Then he put a hand to my face pulled me in and kissed me. Mouths closed at first then his tongue parted my lips and we kissed each other with all the masculinity we had within us. A deep, wet kiss. Tongues twirling in torrent with mouths moaning with pleasure. We brazenly embraced and frot our cum soaked bodies together with the passion and lust we reserve for female one night stands.

We came a second time in that mad, erotic, embrace. It was if we were scoffing at taboo. We were bending the rules for all they were worth. We separated ... looked at each other, looked around to see if anyone saw us ... looked at each other again and laughed. We laughed as if we shared a meeting of two old friends who hadn't seen each other in a long time. He said "thanks again man" ... This time I replied ... "your welcome!"

They kissed each other with all the masculinity they had in them.

Buddy says they expressed a passion usually "reserve[d] for female one night stands."

And that's interesting, because we know there's a pattern among masculine-identified Men of being promiscuous with women and Faithful to one Male partner.

So these guys have one night stands with women.

But you have to wonder what would have happened if they'd allowed themselves to exchange names and phone numbers.

We came a second time in that mad, erotic, embrace. It was if we were scoffing at taboo. We were bending the rules for all they were worth.

Right.

Except that the rules they're bending are the rules of heterosexualization.

Which says that "real men" don't do what they did.

In reality, and in the past, what they did was reserved for Real Men:

Warriors and Fighters.

We laughed as if we shared a meeting of two old friends who hadn't seen each other in a long time.

And ain't that the truth?

"two old friends who hadn't seen each other in a long time"

The two old friends are the two MEN who dwell within these heterosexualized males -- who are trapped within them.

Suddenly -- thanks to Buddy's act of Warrior Altruism -- those MEN are released from their prisons -- and are able to see their old friends -- who are actually just their authentic selves -- but who they haven't seen in a long time.

Let's hope they get to see each other again -- sometime very soon.

And more than once.

Thank you again Buddy.

A beautiful and illuminating post.

Bill Weintraub

February 20, 2010

© All material Copyright 2010 by Bill Weintraub. All rights reserved.

Related articles:

Sex Between Men: An Activity, Not a Condition

straight, but ...

the hardest i've ever been

Warriorhood and Male Intimacy

a sick society that forces men to repress their natural, wholesome feelings of love for each other

The Right to Fight