For YEARS, I would go through my day-to-day life with HEAVY guilt about how bad a person I was because I had this relentless urge to go cock-to-cock, and cockhead to cockhead with other lean guys who looked like wrestling opponents of my size and ability.

I would jack off about it, over and over, by myself. It was a universe inside my head, even as a small boy.

I think back that the massive confusion was trying to DEFINE what Masculine and Feminine was. If you had a fight on the play ground it was bad, because Jesus would have turned the other cheek. Stupid Nuns had to grill that shit into us every time boys had a fight at recess. How stupid. If you didn't fight back, you were not masculine-identified to yourself, because Natural Males associate fighting back with masculinity. So was Jesus a girly-man? Boys need answers to these sort of questions, early-on. And I think Christianity, aside from being non-sense, screws up the natural male development.

Deep down I LOVED fighting and masculine fight-sport stuff. I've written about watching fights, boxing, and the beauty of males.

Before going to high school, even as a small boy, I can recall times (when I knew I was home alone), going into a large walk-in closet in the upstairs of the house, and stripping to my white briefs and imagining what it would be like to be on the ground wrestling around, like the guys you'd see doing pro-wrestling.

I think that conditioning at home tells a boy whether he should or should not want to flaunt his package. You can see that in high school and college wrestlers; they either walk around at a tournament with their genitals showing through the singlet.

Or they are "modest" about it and wear sweat pants right up to the point that they MUST take them off to walk out on the mat to face their male opponent, man package to man package. YES wrestling gives a Man a boner some times. Your hard boner is part of your masculinity. If anyone makes fun of your hard on, then they're stupid. The erect penis is a good penis.

(Later, the pics I saw in History books and Art books of Greek and Renaissance art would REALLY stir my imagination about nudity with other guys.)

And later, in high school PE, having to get naked at our lockers in the all-boys locker room, and in the one-room showers in high school with other lean developing boys like myself, was going to really stir up my curiosity for masculine identity.

The mutual nudity identified you as Manly.

We were all different. But we were all Males. And it felt REALLY good to gravitate to that Male Side. I remember at that age thinking: I'm really glad to have been born a male. Having a penis is cool. We all have one. Having a ball sack is cool; we all have one. We're all different, but we all have this in common.

The mutual nudity identified you as Manly.

By high school, I could not even have imagined identifying with women. I do remember seeing girls in high school who maybe had a brother that looked like someone I'd like to wrestle and jack-off with. And I would think, if I had kids with her, the boys would turn out like her brother; they would be fighters and wrestlers. If girls were feminine enough and had no muscles (which would totally turn me off) they did turn me on as mating material...for WAY later. But that was it.

Girls in high school would ask ME out. Used to drive me nuts. What was MOST terrifying about that was that it might mean losing contact with my man-friends. Instinctively a male knows that he gets his masculine energy from his male pack of friends. His Peers. It's that locker room thing again....the penis and ball sack identity in the locker room and one-room shower. I remember the shower room and its carrousels of shower-heads,

with a hundred naked dudes, with our hanging man-balls and wieners which we all identified with. A male doesn't want to give up his manliness.

I really do now think that if women just understood that, they would have REALLY loyal husbands (provided that the guy is not some butt fuck queen, into getting his rectum fucked or something).

The high school PE coach referred to us as MEN!

YEARS later I realized why his emphasis on MEN was so important; Feminism was forming-up for an attack on this masculine identity; that would come later.

In all my Catholic School years, my Catholic-guilty side said to NOT think about "attraction to masculinity" because that was something that the other guys were probably NOT thinking about.

HOW STUPID.

By high school, I wondered if just MAYBE, there might be one dude I could trust, to compare cocks with and jack-off together with.

JUST ONE.

And it was SO normal for me to think that way, while feeling that it was totally wrong to think that way.

IT WAS A TERRIBLE LONELINESS FOR A YOUNG DEVELOPING MALE, WHO KNEW HE WAS BUFFED, HAD A PERSISTENT ERECTION, AND WHO HAD A BURNING DESIRE TO COMPETE AND BOND WITH OTHER WRESTLER MALES.... AND IT WOULD TAKE YEARS FOR ME TO REALIZE JUST HOW NORMAL I HAD BEEN. ANY NORMAL MASCULINE GUY WANTS TO COMPETE AND GO PENIS TO PENIS AND SHARE HIS MANLINESS WITH ANOTHER GUY. AND ANY NORMAL MALE LOVES TO, AND IS ATTRACTED BY HIS PENIS AND BALLS TO THE FIGHT.

AND THAT CATHOLIC GUILT ABOUT IT WHICH I WAS GROWING UP WITH REALLY SUCKED.

All the while as a boy I was attending the Catholic School System, not by choice (12 years of it). And the Guilt ramifications were intense, and VERY confusing.

So last night, all the while sitting through mass I was thinking about what I've just written above.

Obviously, the Greek Males of long ago (with whom I very much identify with) were spiritual. They had their own Mythology.

They HAD to have communicated with a higher power, for some kind of connection or approval before fighting or even engaging in battle. Only an idiot would not. Stepping into the circle to fight, IS stepping into the unknown. We're pulled into that fight-unknown, by our balls.

And of course everyone has God on their side when they're going into battle....Right? It's good to at least think that, I guess.

I've never fought in the cage, or in the ring. The cage must be one HOT testosterone driven experience!

I have fought at the Fight School. And I've done college and freestyle wrestling. In matches--any match--a fighter/wrestler MUST focus on the task at hand. A wrestler must size up his opponent. He MUST quickly plan some kind of attack, and be ready with defenses, and counter moves...

But just before that happens any fighter/wrestler/soldier puts his life in the hands of some Higher Power and realizes that that starting point of the battle, MAY be THE limit to any control of our destiny which we may have thought that we had.

In ANY wrestling match, boxing match, MMA fight, grappling match, any war battle, or police action, this may be a fighter's last day. Fight Sports are not a game. In a match between you and the other guy, the contestants really don't know how it is going to turn out. But it's part of the purpose of any male born with a set of testicles, to experience what that unknown is like, to complete his training as a male. Fighting is a right of passage. This facing of unknown danger completes the young male's training and allows him to enter the World of MEN. And this need for completion to enter the World of Men, has been bashed for WAY too long now, especially by feminists and butt fuck queens...

And Unfortunately this True Fight is something that women can never really experience. YES some women can fight. And they can Box. And they can do MMA. And they have been in battles. They are the exceptions, not the rule. Pound for pound, Men must be the fighters in society. Men can fight for freedom, or men can fight for Tyranny. But men must fight to complete their development...

In this way, Fight Sports mimic war, in that the outcome is VERY unknown.....Just like the unknown of who our creator really is, or what lies in the Great Beyond. So to fight you have to be scared, and you have to have courage. But it was THAT great unknown outcome that the Ancient Greeks realized was the CENTRAL PART of being Free Men. Freedom is a mentality. And the fight for Freedom comes from the balls that give you the wherewithal to fight for freedom in the first place, when you really don't know what the outcome will be. That is Courage. Battlefields get littered with the corpses of men who had this courage to fight, for right or for wrong.

Spartans vs Thebans at the Battle of Koronea
Spartans have a Λ on their shields

There are no guarantees. No guarantees is one of the drawbacks of being an Immortal. In Greek Mythology, the Gods were envious of Humans for having this precariousness and danger in their lives. Homer had written that: it was better to be a slave on Earth, than to be a King in Hades. Life was considered good BECAUSE it was dangerous.

In a match, you know that you want the outcome to be Victory (and Freedom). But there is no guarantee that you will win. In battle, if you win, you are free. If you lose (in war) you become the slave of someone else. That is still true today.

In the naked world of the high school locker room, it was the testicles and masculine characteristics (penis, muscles, abs, pecs) that were so cherished by me, as a developing youth. I was lean and buffed. And I liked being around guys who were lean and buffed. I really liked wrestling with the other guys. And I had to painfully hide my hard-on that I got from it. The guilt and shame were terrible. At times it was a feeling of being half-man.

In the naked locker room, boys learned how to walk with a male confident swagger. No Swish. We instinctively learned to show our ball sacks and penises, without shame. We were MALE. We butched up in the naked locker room, instinctively, because the other dudes did too. There was no instruction book for it. It just happened that way.

Masculine Characteristics are admired and cherished by ALL males Worldwide, whether they admit it or not. It's why men go watch football for shit sake! Men want to watch Men do battle, because battle is what Men want to do, instinctively.

They want to watch it; and they want to do it.

My mind raced through all these thoughts and scenarios, as I sat through the bla, bla, bla of Christmas Eve mass.

No offense intended, but I have NO desire to turn the other cheek when someone does me harm. I believe that a person has the right to defend himself. I believe we have a certain amount of control over our destiny. I am a believer in God. God talks to me some times. Spirits really are all around us. But we CAN think. We CAN understand right and wrong. Common sense tells you to have a conscience.

We have the right to fight.

I am a believer in Natural Law. Natural Law says that competition is Good. Justice and Fairness are Good too. Compassion is necessary for humans to live in some kind of harmony. I do not believe that Humans are stupid animals with no responsibility for their actions, due to some pre-determination from "God."

Maybe being stuck in church for an hour on Christmas Eve gave me a chance to think again, about how much guilt and anti-male junk I'd carried with me for years and years from attending Catholic Schools and Church. Sitting through an hour of mass made me realize how much I just can't relate to any of it.

I am a Free Thinking Male now. And I feel sorrow and empathy for people stuck in a revolving door of guilt.

The one thing that IS necessary in my view, at Christmas is to loosen up and give a little to those who have not kept up. There is WAY too much emphasis at Christmas on buying stupid plastic shit made by Chinese slaves--many of them, children. Christmas has become a materialistic plastic Chinese holiday. Even if you DO believe in the whole Jesus story, the materialistic side of Christmas at the shopping malls REALLY SUCKS.

At Christmas time just act like a Man. Connect with people a little.

And don't forget your Man-Buddies. Your man-buddies helped make you a Man.

Bill Weintraub

Re: The Right to Fight

12-26-09

Thank you NW.

Two crucial points among many:

ANY NORMAL MASCULINE GUY WANTS TO COMPETE AND GO PENIS TO PENIS AND SHARE HIS MANLINESS WITH ANOTHER GUY. AND ANY NORMAL MALE LOVES TO, AND IS ATTRACTED BY HIS PENIS AND BALLS TO THE FIGHT.

...

In ANY wrestling match, boxing match, MMA fight, grappling match, any war battle, or police action, this may be a fighter's last day. Fight Sports are not a game. In a match between you and the other guy, the contestants really don't know how it is going to turn out. But it's part of the purpose of any male born with a set of testicles, to experience what that unknown is like, to complete his training as a male. Fighting is a right of passage. This facing of unknown danger completes the young male's training and allows him to enter the World of MEN. And this need for completion to enter the World of Men, has been bashed for WAY too long now, especially by feminists and butt fuck queens...

Sometimes I think that if I could get just one of you to understand what NW just said, I'd have accomplished something.

Let's repeat it:

Fight Sports are not a game. In a match between you and the other guy, the contestants really don't know how it is going to turn out. But it's part of the purpose of any male born with a set of testicles, to experience what that unknown is like, to complete his training as a male. Fighting is a right of passage. This facing of unknown danger completes the young male's training and allows him to enter the World of MEN. And this need for completion to enter the World of Men, has been bashed for WAY too long now, especially by feminists and butt fuck queens...

Fighting is a rite of passage and a right of passage.

As a Man, you have a right to that rite.

And there are dojos and Fight Schools everywhere.

If you come to this site, and you're young enough to train, and you're not training, you are NOT a warrior.

I don't care how many blogs or other bullshit you have on the web.

You have to train.

There is no substitute for the real thing.

You need to train, you need to spar, you need to Fight.

And you need to do it while you're still young enough to do it.

NW also says,

And don't forget your Man-Buddies. Your man-buddies helped make you a Man.

Right.

And that means giving.

If you're not giving, you're not a man, and you're not a warrior.

You're nothing.

And in 'tis the season to be selfish, I told you what's going to happen to you.

You probably think it's a metaphor.

You're wrong.

And along those lines, NW says

The [ancient Greeks] HAD to have communicated with a higher power, for some kind of connection or approval before fighting or even engaging in battle. Only an idiot would not.

Xenophon, the Athenian aristocrat and mercenary who led 10,000 Greek hoplites on a desperate fight out of Persia and who then ended up living on an estate gifted to him by the Spartans, says, in his treatise on the duties of a calvary commander,

If anyone is surprised at my frequent repetition of the exhortation to work with God [God willing], I can assure him that his surprise will diminish if he is often in peril, and if he considers that in time of war foemen plot and counterplot, but seldom know what will come of their plots. Therefore there is none other that can give counsel in such a case but the Gods. ... And we may suppose that they are more ready to counsel those who not only ask what they are to do in the hour of need, but also serve the Gods in the days of their prosperity with all their might.

~The Cavalry Commander, ix 8-9, translated by Marchant

Xenophon, by the way, was present at the battle of Koronea -- you saw an artist's conception of it above -- fighting on the side of the Spartans, with his friend, the Spartan king Agesilaus, who

made a furious frontal attack on the Thebans. Thrusting shield against shield, they shoved and fought and killed and fell. There was no shouting, nor was there silence, but the strange noise which wrath and battle together will produce.

~Agesilaus, ii 12, translated by Marchant

Spartans vs Thebans at the Battle of Koronea
Spartans have a Λ on their shields

Agesilaus was carried wounded from the field, but the Spartans won the battle.

Thank you again NW.

You're a true Warrior.

Guys, Naked Wrestler, aka NW, has wrestled and trained in mixed martial arts, and has many very important posts on our Man2Man Alliance sites, including:

aggression and the beauty of guys;

The Warrior Male;

Total Masculinity;

It takes Balls to be a Warrior [not yet posted];

my first shirtless wrestling opponent;

to be One with the Man I wrestle;

Forced Hetero-sexualization and the death of Man Space;

Full Mount Fight;

The Masculinity Zone;

Becoming ONE in the FIGHT: The Intimacy of Aggression;

Fighting and Freedom;

Take You On at the Pond;

our American forced Hetero-sexualized society;

Fighting is part of the Human Condition;

Men being Men;

The Masculine Male;

The Weight Room;

Wrestling Rides -- Get to know your man;

Hip Control in Pankration.

The MAN Area II

MAN SPACE;

MANBALLS;

the Man area;

balls and the man;

Fighting is good;

Freeballing is good;

Fighting is Man. Man is Good;

MANPHOBIA -- Fired for being into UFC;

balls against balls;

Fighting is Man;

The Ultimate in Man to Man; and

Cockfuckin Man to Man.

Plus replies to many posts, including

touching penises when hugging; and

Go Shirtless: In support of a brother!!