Finding Manhood on the Mat

In this true life account, warrior scott has written a powerful statement about overcoming fear and finding masculinity.

At the end I've added to it some of his super hot emails about wrestlin and cockrubbin. Clearly, both are expressions of his manhood.

Every Man Has 'EM

my heart dropped into my belly, and both arms went numb. coach simms had just announced my opponent's name for my wrestling match, and damn, it had to be ron. of all the guys that i could have ended up takin' on, it was our class president and all around mr. perfect, the class jock stud.

growin up in nebraska, the winters were 5 months long, and gym classes seemed even longer. my dad moved around so much when i was young, that we never seemed to stay in one place long enough for me to even know him. he would move, we would follow. that was the norm, and it left little time for him to teach me the ways of boyhood, much less what to expect when i entered manhood. by the time i had reached high school, most guys lived and breathed sports, all sports, knew all the rules, and had enough talent to do any one of them and, to do them well.

every year, my least favorite part of gym class was wrestling. it was a 6 week period that seemed to last a lifetime. pairing off in two's and sparring during 4th period class, basically just goin at each other, like two boys trying to be superior to the other. and, as i've come to realize later in life, mostly just faking it all the while. who knew back then, that we all were pretty much scared of wrestling another guy. scared that another guy in class would find out our secret of being afraid, and exploit it to the entire gym class either in the locker room, or in the school hallways.

coach simms would spend each class period showing us a few moves to put on our opponents, and how to gain leverage and control over our classmates. for me, since i didnt have the courage to give it my all, i would just simply go through the motions. i'd take my turn, trying to get a grip on the other guy, not knowing what in the name of god it was that i was doing. i learned quickly to hide my worry and confusion, to keep up appearances that i was a tough guy and not afraid in the least. if they gave out academy awards for faking the part of having balls, i would have won all three years of high school. and won, going away.

the class weeks were set up so that by the end of the instructional part of wrestling, the final week entailed actual mat competition. the monday of the last week began by putting 18 rubber mats in a perfect square in the middle of the school gym, and all the guys in our class would gather around. sitting on their knees, or crossed legs, they would sit and watch as each guy's name was called, and his opponent was announced to the rest of the group. it was setup fairly well, for me that is, in that if you lost your first match, you were eliminated from any final competition and could sit out the rest of the week. but that was the paradox of it all. lose that one and only match was fine, but due to fear, that match might as well have been 3 hours long. the humility and terror that i felt during that one match, seemed to last almost a lifetime. but, if i could just get thru that 3 round match of 2 minutes each, i could survive. the teasing from the other guys would subside by the 2nd or 3rd day, and i could go back to being just another gym class wimp. a nobody, a wuss, a gymclass freak.

well, here i was. standing up, and walking out to the center of the mat, in front of 47 other teenage guys, all of them knowing that i was about to get my ass kicked clean into next week. as i approached my competition in the center "ring", i looked around at the faces of the other guys. they were smiling, and pointing, and saying "scott doesnt stand a chance, he's lost already" and "man, this will be a quick one..." or "why does he even bother to get in there?... ". i haven't been humiliated too much in my lifetime, but it's a memory that i wont ever forget. feeling bad about yourself is agony enough, but knowing what others, much less a group of guys feels about you, was pure hell.

at that point, i had a revelation. and it has changed my life forever. it hit me... "i can do one of two things here. im gonna lose, that's almost a gimme. but, i have a choice, a real choice and one that only i can make. i can either walk out, shake hands, go thru the motions and lose quickly. pry my heart, my ego, and my manhood off the mat and go sit down, as every guy in that gym class expects me to do, or i can take him on. fight him, get him, sic him, take him down, give him 20 pounds of my sweat, and 500 pounds of "i dont give a shit" attitude and shock the hell out of him, and, 47 other guys.. "

i chose the latter, and i havent regretted it ..ever.. i re-live that match in my mind, over and over and over again. and each time, i grin ear-to-ear with the same encouragement that i felt at that moment.

ron and i stood there, his blond good looks, his 172 pound frame and good-guy smile greeted me as we shook hands. i liked ron, everybody liked ron. that was probably the worst part about it. how could i fight and hate this guy enough to try to beat him, much less embarrass him. but i had the one thing this guy DIDNT have... nothin to lose. if he won, it was no big deal. it was expected, i wasnt a challenge, and he would move on to the next match, as though he had never known me, much less ever even met me on the mats, in a man to man combat wrestling match. but, if he LOST, who would believe it, much less  understand how it could happen?

after we shook hands, mentally as if i was my own guardian angel, i told myself.... "ok man, take him.. give him every ounce of strength and determination you've got. make him fight you, make him work for his win, make him know that he had a piece of you and that you didnt back down or run. make him smell your sweat on his chest and arms and hands and belly when he hits the showers afterward. earn his respect, make him remember who you are... ".

i can guarantee you this. ron remembers me to this day. we went right into battle the second the coach's whistle blew. i didnt give a shit, i was goin' after him, and i wanted him bad. i threw my forearm around his neck, and put him in a headlock, face pointed down and his back arched in a V at his waist, with his forehead parallel to the mat. my other fist locked on his right bicep and slid down to his forearm, as i pulled it back behind his body, and forced him to the mat, face hitting the mat with quick determination from the warrior he took for granted. i couldn't believe the reaction from the rest of the guys around the mat. even in battle, i could sense an unsettling quiet hush, come over the group as if they were in complete disbelief and amazement. who was this loser that ron was wrestlin'? he's supposed to give up, roll over and play dead, no competition, right?...

at that point i thought, " hell, let's give these boys a show then shitface. let's give em somethin to talk about for a long, long time. let's let em know that maybe, just maybe, i was their equal, not their patsy, not their class nut-less clown that they'd all come to know, and let's just see if YOU'RE man enough to take ME on??.."

ron and i exchanged holds over and over again. one of my favorites that i didnt even realize that i knew how to apply, was the "armpit smeller". i always thought that coach loved to demonstrate it the most. figure it out.. in front of a group of sweaty high school guys in jockstraps, he picked out the beefiest guy, and get him down on all fours. he'd bury his entire face in the guys left armpit, and grab his forearm and try to wishbone him apart into submission, all the while his nose got a full whiff of manstench outta the kids armpit. i bet you any amount of money, he boned up half-hard during the demonstration, and, ended up jacking his cock off in the shower after the end of the day. if i would have had the balls, i would have snuck back after last period, crept into the locker room, stripped down to my jockstrap and beat my penis as i watched him beat his in the shower stall.

ron and i gave our all to each other. he'd get me in a head lock and try a takedown, i'd resist, counter with a full nelson and demand that he try to release himself out of it, just sliding down from my sweaty pecs as i held him in my body lock. i could smell him, feel his body on mine, and although my penis was round tight into the butt crack of his singlet, i didnt bone up. pretty strange, seeing as i'd jackoff time and time again at home, just watchin the late night wrestling on tv.

after each of the 2 minute matches, we'd separate from one another, and go to our respective "corners" of the mat, take a few breaths and get back into the center of the ring. it's funny, each time we'd approach each other for the next round, i could sense that ron was becoming more and more impressed with my guts to take him on, and was in complete surprise that i hadn't given up. each time, i'd attack him more and more aggressively, and strangely enough, i think he got off on that. he liked competition, rough manly competition, and was gettin into the fact that, I was gettin' into it!!

i will never ever forget the end to our match. the coach's final whistle blew and the entire crowd of guys were on their feet!! there i was, standing on the center of the mat, hands on my waist, the salt of my own sweat pouring down off of my forehead down into each eye with intensity and sting. i looked over at ron, and he was pacing around the mat, hands on his waist as well, with his blond sweat-soaked hair crumpled over his ears and strewn over to one side. and, he was SMILING! every tooth in his mouth, was big and white and you could see clear into his throat. i looked over at him as if to say ".. you asshole, i got a piece of you today, and it's a piece i'm never ever gonna let you get back... !"

ron came out to meet me in the center of the mat, as the sound of the other guys cheers and applause reverberated off the 2 story walls that encompassed the gym, and i could see 'em all high-fivin' each other, lookin at us both like we had just showed all the other guys, what it means to have a set of balls under a guy's penis.

i stuck out my hand to shake ron's, but i refused to smile. i kept my fighter stance, one hand on my waist, the other outstreched to meet his fist, to show an end to our match. but, we didn't shake hands that day. ron knocked my fist out of the way and lunged forward, and wrapped his arms around my chest and gave me a bear hug!! a tight one, a manly hug of congratulations to a fellow warrior, battle over, manhood proven. i could feel his pecs and nipples on mine, his sweaty tense muscled neck grinding into mine, and the stench from his armpits on my biceps, as i gave him his bearhug back to him, in return. the coach came onto the mat and held up the arm of the winner. then, more applause came from the crowd. but it was a roar of congratulations for BOTH men, not just the victor.

Ron was the winner that day, but me, I was the victor!! as i left the mat to go back and take my place on the edge of the mat with the other guys, i was slapped on the back and given my own high-fives! over and over again, i would hear ".. damn, great job man!"... or, "you sure impressed the fuck outta me, pal.. ". i had arrived... finally i had arrived as a man, among other men, and i was one with them. i was an equal, not a subordinate. i was a fighter, no longer a runner full of fear and weakness.

Ron won the match that day, by a score of 3-2. he didnt pin me, in fact he COULNDT pin me. that day, NOBODY could have pinned me. i found my heart, deep inside my belly that day. but it was surrounded by real guts... guts that i didnt even know that i had. but i learned a valuable lesson that day. i learned that having heart and having guts, are one and the same. you can't have one, without having the other. every man has 'em, it just may take longer for one guy to find em. i found my guts that day, and i've never lost 'em since. and you'll find yours too buddy, just pry em up off the floor!

teen warriors scott and ron

(hope you liked it some, bill? kinda wordy, sorry i wrote so much.. im in shock myself.. once i get started, i cant stop.. this match really happened man. and im still grinning ear to ear when i look back on it just now.. what a memory.. thanks for your time pal!! )

hey bill-
thanks for writin back buddy. i went to your site and read the story you had written [THE FIGHT]. man, i could sure relate. Ever since junior high gym class, i've been turned on by locker room type man sex. watchin guys walkin around in jockstraps and boners floppin around. all the while, carrying a deep lust and hunger for feeling their bodies grind up against mine in hot sweaty cock to cock battle, pre-cum oozing from each man's piss slit, and the feel of my big smooth manballs grindin into his.

once in high school, we practiced wrestling for 9 weeks each year, and every nite, i would go home and masturbate on my chest, dreamin of a late nite match with other guys from my class. then, hittin the showerin and goin down on one anothers penis. two men, boned up and hungry for male body contact and penis battle. i get a hardon watchin my nude oil wrestlin videos big time. i sure dont understand why there isnt more frottage in these damn films. to me, and you i now know, its a pure turn on in my groin..

i love showin a guy how much sperm i carry in my nuts and tryin to see which one of us has the most manjuice... pure manhood.

well, now that i've gotten myself boned up here, i better close.

thanks for your article buddy. keep it hard, man..

scott

hey bill-
man, thanks for the email man. i think you and me would have a good hot time buddy.. dont even know what you look like, but if the feel of your oiled body and penis up against mine is any indication, i think they'd have to pry us apart. just lookin down at both of our cockheads oozin pre-cum onto one another would be hotter than hell. See our nut sacks full of juice, bangin into each other in sweat, and our nips grindin chest to chest, humpin each others body to struggle for control.... i dont think we'd even have to touch each others dicks- we'd be spermin each others bellys and pecs all out, in a jizm battle... take you into the shower and take a piss together afterwards, like two warriors after battle.. just hosin down cock to cock...

man, would love to have you smellin me and me, you...love man stench .... put my face up under your balls and see what your manhood smells like with my cock sweat all over you... mmmm thanks for the boner this morning..

scott

hey, cockfighter buddy boy... how's that man weapon hangin? just got home from work and thought i'd send ya back a note.

man, what i would give to smell your armpits, groin and butt crack after i had it out with you pal..?!

i cant write too much here man... im 1/2 hard as it is still,  wantin to feel your stiff penis in my fist, your fist on mine, and doin some pre-battle challenge in mutual cock tug o war.. movin our fists down under each others hangin ball sacks, and cuppin our palms under the other guys gonads.
knowin we both had the other guys cum loads to get out of each others cockpole, and just how much hot thick man wad the other man had up inside him....

you and i have the same (i think) thoughts about two men and their penis's and how much hot man sex can come from the sweaty male bonding of two nude bodies

scott

sweaty male bonding of two nude bodies